Who am i?

 Do you ever feel like there's something wrong with you but you can't quite explain it or figure it out? Me too. I wish this could be a post where I help others going through the same thing but unfortunately, it's not because I don't even know how to help myself. Every day I feel like I'm different people in one body, my mood and personality feel so mercurial that I don't even know who I am. I can't figure myself out and don't feel understood by anybody. I don't feel like anyone gets me. I always feel like a problem, and I feel like there is a problem inside me, but I don't know what it is. I want to be normal- I said this to my old therapist and she answered with "What is normal?" and what I think normal is, but I can't put that into words. Normal is just normal, normal is not what I'm feeling, it's something else - it's just normal, you know? I don't know who I am and it's killing me, I want to know who I am. I want someone to understand me but I can never find them. I want to be left alone but I also want help, I can't face whatever this is that's inside of me - I don't have the guts to truly understand myself. So maybe that is my problem? Maybe it's because I can never face what makes me uncomfortable and do something challenging. I don't want to be a person, but I want to be every person, I want to understand every emotion - maybe to try and figure out my own. I want to be something else, anything but myself.

But I'm just a teenage girl, is this really what life is? Is this really what I will be forever, unsure of myself and of my life?

I want to go to bed and sleep through it all.

"hell is a teenage girl" - Jennifer's Body